Reflections & Anniversaries...Day 38

Three years ago today - we were all busy getting ready for Ben and Abby's Wedding in Washington, DC. It was a magical evening - as many weddings are - but this was extra extra special. All of Ben and Abby's people from all across the country were in one place. All our families so present to celebrate such a joyous life moment, and I'm sure somewhat aware of the importance of appreciating the NOW! We danced, we drank, we drank, we drank, and we celebrated. It warms my heart and my being to think about just how special December 30th, 2018 was...It breaks my heart that on what would've been Ben and Abby's third wedding anniversary - Raj and I are headed to visit Ben's gravestone... Life isn't fair, it often doesn't make sense, it's filled with the highest highs and lowest lows, and so many unexpected turns. I don't hold on to a belief that there is meaning in everything that happens in life - I don't think this bone marrow transplant has happened for some higher purpose, and I certainly don't believe Ben's passing was part of some higher force's plan. However, I do believe, very deeply, that we are meant to learn from these experiences. Learn from the heart ache, the sorrow, the joy, the laughter. On today's anniversary of Ben and Abby's wedding I'm remembering that love is meant to be celebrated, that regardless of what you're facing in life - you should keep on living, and keep on living as big as you can. I'm remembering that my brother never spent a day of his life preparing to die, he spent it living more out of every moment he had. Happy Anniversary Ben and Abby! This will always be a day to remember your love for each other, the coming together of families and friends, and PURE CELEBRATION!

Health Update

• Ear Infection feels like its on the mend! Phew...Will get confirmation next week. Definitely less ear pain!

• Feeling a bit stronger this week, and excited to begin the official "physical rehab program" next week, once the doctor clears me to start rebuilding some of the strength I've lost these past many weeks.

• Eyeing a potential "first" covid vaccination on January 10th - fingers crossed for an ANC above 700 by then.

What's Entertaining Us:

• Yesterday, a second porch visit from the FEFFERS! On Steve's Birthday, too! Always wonderful to catch up with my cousins Laura, Steve, and Gabriel! Years of Forensics competitions mean that Laura and I are great at real projecting our voices - a useful skill when talking through the window! Also excited to learn that Gabriel is a next generation taking up Forensics!

• In the "before times" before bone marrow transplants, before covid isolation, I may be anxiously awaiting many types of deliveries. A new outfit for a night on the town? A delivery o fThai Food from a great local Brooklyn spot with share with Michael and Ian? Delivery of last minute preparations for a dinner party? Today I anxiously awaited a delivery of a half cord of firewood. I previously did not know the terminology for quanities of wood, how fast one might go through firewood, the types of firewood...Alas so much learning during this experience! #Signofthetimes #Ruralliving #Firesarethehighlightofeveryday

• Movie of the night: TENDER BAR - Touching, meaningful, heart-warming, Ben Affleck....SO worth a watch!

What I'm grateful for:

• My mom has now been gone for Friess Lake for a few days, still isolating, but at her own house...We miss her and loved her visit yesterday (with Rocky Rococo's too!! A favorite Milwaukee pizza place from my childhood).

• Friends (we hung up all of our holiday cards on the fridge last night, so thankful to see the faces of such an incredible community of people we are so lucky to have in our lives.

• A chance to reset for a New Year...more on that tomorrow!